family stuff

a (slight) retraction

A family member reached out to me yesterday after reading my post. This family member wanted to make it clear to me that they never doubted my word or my daughter’s. After re-reading my post, I can see that I did paint a picture of the entire family closing ranks with me and my children on the outside. That’s not how it played out. Some believed me, and others didn’t. Most didn’t. Some did. Nearly all have accepted my brother back as a part of their lives. Because he has “served his time. Gone to therapy, and tried to put that part of his life behind him.”

And I repeat… that is their choice. I don’t deny them that choice, and I don’t resent it. I don’t ask them to exclude him from their lives or pick “him or me”. It’s not fair of me to do so. I understand their decisions even if I don’t agree with them. They are free to invite both of us to celebrations. It’s my choice not to attend. I don’t ask them to change their actions so long as they don’t resent mine.

Anyway, I did want to let y’all know that my family didn’t circle the wagons around my brother, leaving me and my girls out in the cold. A great deal of them outside of the immediate family — after the initial denial — simply ignored the whole thing and wished it would go away.


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