daily prompt

Back from the dead?

'Of course I am back from the grave, it's really boring in there.'

I don’t care if it’s boring. 

So, I’ve answered this prompt before, and like I said in my old answer, if — as the prompt suggests — one of [my] late ancestors were to come back from the dead and join [me] for dinner… I might be a little upset about that because they’re supposed to be dead and the dead should remain dead. Now, as I mentioned in my previous answer, if one of my late ancestors were to suddenly appear on my doorstep, I would do everything in my power to get them the hell off of my doorstep and get them back into the grave where they belong. I’d call me a Priest, a Rabbi, a Voodoo priest, a Chaplin, a coven of witches, maybe even the Winchester brothers if they’re available… Whatever I needed to send my late ancestor back into their grave, because I’m not having dinner with the walking dead. It’s not happening. Sorry, Grandma, I liked you, but back into the grave you go. Hie thee hence!  I’ll have no truck with the walking dead. They’re smelly, messy, gross, and dead for a reason. No good can come from dealing with the walking dead.

old hroldan ghost

They can eat their own ghostly food

Now, if a ghost were to appear on my doorstep, that might be a different story. At least they won’t be dropping bits of rotting flesh and formaldehyde — or whatever it is they stuff dead people with when they bury them — all over my floor. I’m sure that junk is difficult to get out of the rug. I don’t know if ectoplasm is real or not, but if it is, I betcha it’s way easier to get out of the carpets than rotting flesh. It probably smells better too. Who knows? Other than my ghost cat (which left no trace of itself either way), I’ve little dealings with physical manifestations of ghosts. But I digress (because, you know, I never do that). Anyway, if an old family ghost showed up, I might wonder about why one of my ancestors bothered to bring themselves suddenly and without warning to my doorstep after all of these years, but hey, come on in ghost of my late relative. Slip on over the the couch and we’ll talk a spell. I’ve got no problems with that so long as they don’t plan on making trouble. The prompt also asks: what things about your family would this person find the most shocking? 

http://www.dreamstime.com/royalty-free-stock-photos-image34554798

I actually miss canning food

Well, at the time of this writing, my immediate family consists of myself, the hubster, and our furbabies (two dogs and a cat). I think, that should any of my distant family come to dinner, they might find it shocking that cooking is not a thing in our house. There are myriad reasons why we don’t cook, but the long and short of it is, we order most of our dinners from nearby restaurants. That was a shock to me too when I first married the hubster. And I know that it would shock the hell out of anyone on my mother’s side of the family. Seriously, eating take out food or food cooked by others would flat out horrify my hard working farm-stock family.  My mom’s dad had a dairy farm for goodness’ sake.  From what I can recall of most of that side of the family, they grew most of their food, or at least bought fresh from the market and nearly all of them put up food for the winter. If one of them came to my house and saw that we ate our meals prepared by others they’d have a cow. I can imagine it now… My ghostly ancestor walking about with their hands waving in the air… Not cook? Not even have a garden? What the hell, girl? Are you out of your mind? What are you going to do in an emergency? What about if the roads close? You have nothing in your pantry!  And that’s not even being misogynistic of them. My grandfather worked hard to keep his pantry stocked too with beef and whatnot.  These were farming people. They simply did not pay others to feed them.

nagging ghost

nagging ghost meme

Trust me, oh not so ancient relative o’ mine. I am fully aware of the state of my pantry and it bugs the hell out of me too. I’m working on it! Stop bugging me! >_<  Seriously, I have all the stuff to put food up. I have a pressure cooker, a dehydrator, canning supplies, etc… When we lived in New Mexico, I had enough food put by to last at least a month should we need it. Somehow, that just hasn’t happened since moving here. I think we have about a week’s worth of food and water. It’s not enough. I can hear my ancestor berating me even without a visit from the grave. I can’t explain the how or why, but it simply hasn’t gotten done. I’m on it Grandma! By the way, as an aside, my mother’s mother is very much alive, I speak to my Mother’s father’s mother, who passed some time ago when she was about 97. We breed young and live long on that side of the family.

Advertisements

4 thoughts on “Back from the dead?

    • I love to cook. I really do. The main problem is this. I find it very difficult to cook for two people and my husband doesn’t eat left overs. Like, ever. Also, he’s used to restaurant food (he’s been a bachelor for a long time), so my food isn’t quite to his taste. Homemade is way different than restaurant. So, it’s just been… difficult… to find that middle ground.

      Like

What say you?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s