My mind is weird. That’s the only way to describe what happens when I get into this state of “I can’t do anything until this happens because…” and no real reason comes to mind other than I’m waiting for the latter thing to happen before I can do the former. There’s no reason to put off the former other than I’m waiting for the latter. I can’t even count the number of times I’ve put off something because I was waiting for something else (okay, that’s a weak link, but hey, it’s a link)
Example. Our new dog, Paco, had an appointment at the vet’s yesterday — routine checkup for a new adoption — at six in the evening. That’s 6:00 PM… That’s like, ten hours after I woke my happy ass up and dragged myself out of bed, ten hours to get stuff done. Did I get anything done? No! Why? because my mind kept reminding me that I had this appointment at 6 pm that I had to be ready for. Even though I knew, logically, that I had plenty of time to get ready for it. I mean, I’m not completely nuts. I knew that there was a whole day between the time I woke up and his appointment… but yeah… not much got done. Okay, I did some laundry, and I made some phone calls and sent some emails, but I didn’t do anything of note. For example, the place still needs vacuuming and the cat box is in dire need of attention. The corners of my house have so many dust bunnies I should start naming them. And honestly, having my pet go to the vet had absolutely nothing to do with anything else I needed to do yesterday, so there was no reason for me to put anything off until he went to the vet. It’s just a weird thing my mind does sometimes. I’ve been letting things slide lately because I’ve been tired, but yesterday I had the energy to do things I just couldn’t push past that “I can’t do anything because I have to be here at…” thing my mind does.
It was kinda weird when I was working and I had a doctor’s appointment. I really wanted to take a whole day off every time (but didn’t), or at least half a day until the appointment was over because I’d be anxious the entire day. I’d usually try to schedule in the morning if I could otherwise I’d spend the entire time at working thinking, You have this appointment… you have this appointment… what are you doing at work? You have this appointment… It made scheduling appointments really stressful to the point where I often put it off (and still do).
Want to know why my yard is such a mess (yesterday’s post)? Because I’m seriously waiting for the fence for the dogs to be put in. Yep. I’m stuck in this state of “I can’t do anything…” because I need the fence put in for the dogs first. I think it’s because I want them outside with me, but I can’t get anything done if I have them on leashes. But if they’re in their own fence, then they’ll be outside with me, but safe and sound behind the fence. Yeah, not completely logical, but logic doesn’t play into things like this. Anyway, for some reason, that will give me peace of mind to be able to roam about the yard and get stuff done. I don’t know why. Luckily, we’ve already got the ball rolling on that one and it should be installed within the next week or two. Then, hopefully, I can break out of this funk and get some stuff done. For today though, I’m gonna clean the cat box (because it desperately needs it), vacuum, and finish the laundry. And that, dear readers, will be the limit of my energy right there. I may be getting it back, but I’m still tired as anything. ^_^